lazin' around in bangkok...

so i'll have been in bangkok for a full week and i cant say i know exactly what it is weve been doing...

i can start off by listing all the wierd shit you can get here on khao san road:
-brass knuckles
-taser guns
-dreadlock and cornrow extensions
-'lacoste' shirts
-tattoo guns
-pad thai cooked up on the street for 20 baht which is less than a dollar
-fake drivers licenses, journalist passes, diplomas...
-'fucking good beer' and 'very strong cocktails. we dont check id'
-and of course, piercings and tattoos.

anyway, i find that you can get all that kind of amusing. lets see what have we been doing...well our guesthouse has a 24 hr restaurant that has a big ass tv thats constantly showing dvds so that takes up a good amount of time. on one day me and mini saw a thai movie, i think it was called 'me, myself'...something like that. it was kind of like a love story involving a drag queen who had amnesia, fantastic! really theres just been an awful lot of us wandering up and down khao san road, kind of like what everyone else here seems to be doing, and me whining about me being fat. thats the honest truth!

the wierdest thing, i ran into a girl i had class with at ubc right here in my guesthouse the other nite. what are the chances? so that was cool and we went with her and her friend to check out one of the infamous ping pong shows. im assuming everyone knows what that is but if you dont, its basically a strip club that has tragic girls pulling wierdo tricks using their *ahem* 'private parts' (thats for my parents whom i know are reading this!) it was actually horrid. they had some hot chicks up there but also really fat and old ones and it was the latter whom were performing the tricks. and i got hit in the fucking head with one of the ping pong balls (and again, for those who dont know, this means the ping pong ball that was shot out of the dear woman's vagina)! i gave my hair a seeeeerious wash when i got home. and i dont know what's up here but back home strippers have to be at least semi attractive. but not the ones over here! they were wearing shit like polka dot bikinis, socks with panda bears on them, just some seriously homely underwear. yuck. some other tricks we saw were pulling razor blades out, smoking a cigarette... all the while the music would periodically stop so the announcer could shout out "ping pong! pussy! ping pong! lady pussy!" it was a magical experience.

oh and i had my thai massage class which was good but im afraid i dont remember even half the shit i learned. i also got more massages which is actually even more fun. today we went to the weekend market which is just an insanely huge market, something like 1500 stalls! a little overwhelming and i didnt get as much stuff as i wanted so that was a bit sad but it was pretty crazy.

ah but we have done some touristy shit. we went to the palace and...some temple... ok i dont remember what its called but its joined with the palace and had incredible looking buildings and statues. and seemingly the thai just love anything gold and sparkly so there was a hell of a lot of that going on. if i ever stop being so fuckign lazy ill be sure to put up pictures. fuck, i frustrate myself with my laziness! anyway...that nite we went to see a traditional thai masked dance performance which i thoroughly enjoyed. have you ever seen the musical movie 'the king and i'? well its like the performance in that movie (mom and reyna, you know what im talking about!) cept way bigger of a production and in a really nice venue. it'll sound fucked up but basically it was about a white monkey and he has to perform all these tasks to help out a god or something... oh and im sure youve seen it, but i think its really cool how the performers' fingers can curl backwards, it mustve been a painful process to get that going on. anyway, it was really nice to go to a real production in a theater again.

oh and the guy that sold us the tickets was such a doll, we got the tickets at the palace and he was so super enthusiastic bout the show, wanting us to spread the love of thai culture or somethign like that. he even gave us a mad discount on the tickets something like from 1200 to 700 baht and we got super good seats right up near the front cause he reeeeaaaaallly wanted us foreigners to go see it. and when we arrived at the theater, he was there waiting for us cause he wanted to give us the brochures for the show, how lovely is that?

and yesterday we went and saw a giant ass reclining golden buddha. it was really impressive cept i put a damper on the whole thing myself cause i was grumpy as fuck and then i was inappropriately dressed so i had to shell out 5 bucks to buy myself a sarong i dont want. and then when i got in, they made me put like a fuckign table cloth over my shoulders as well cause apparently my tank top was still inappropriate even though other chicks were wearing the same shit! so basically everytime there are pictures of me at some touristy place, im either in some rental outfit of a mans dress shirt and sarong, or me wearing rags. but anyway i'll shut up cause really its not that tragic. so today we head down south for the big full moon party. i dont really know how i feel about it all but we'll see! and mini's friends from ireland are slowly arriving here in increments so soon i'll be surrounded by irishmen which should be interesting (joolia i miss you and your estrogen!)...